Dissecting Popular IT Nerds

Dissecting Popular IT Nerds header image 1
April 3, 2020  

Big Red IT Flags Showing Up

1/3 of Americans DO NOT take their vacation days... look at us now!

I did this show with Michael Horn pre-apocalypse

We talked about mandatory Vacations and how they prevent Collusion

So I have a few questions,

Has working from home revealed any holes in your network?

Or has it revealed people that have been robbing the company?

Anyone been cooking the books?

This is a perfect time to find people that have been robbing the company... as horrible as that sounds, its true.

But it’s also a time to cross-train employees...

It’s a time to enable and identify new leaders....

Who is stepping up right now?

Who is doing nothing?

Michael Horn (IT Director at First Mile), and I discussed all of this... ironically weeks ago.

  • Are you just another number?
  • I run a meritocracy
  • Unlimited PTO versus 9-5
  • Get the job done well versus show up as a body...
  • And who is Tom Brady?
  • Yada yada yada
March 25, 2020  

DORK Trace & Poking holes in your network

My wife (aka end-user) looked up at the ceiling last night and said, “What’s that?”

We were standing in my home office where the ceiling had just been repainted.

For years it was like most ceilings...

Smudges here and there

Never been tended to in years.

Now it was a smooth uniform white, except for one little convex area as round as the lip of a coffe mug.

It only appeared after everything had been painted.

Meaning... it was there before, but couldn’t be seen until everything was white... then the shadows appeared

Kind of like shadow IT appearing when you go put in the effort to unify all your applications, tools, and resources.

“I don’t know what that is,” I said.

So I pulled up a chair and stood up to touch it.

Just the lightest pressure applied sent my finger through the ceiling

Cracking the egg-shelled white ceiling paint... Drywall falling to the floor... followed by black speckled particles.


My whole hand easily penetrated the ceiling... fingers pulling down soaked and molded plaster-board.

I’m sure you can imagine the rest of the story.

Point is... how many holes do we have in our network.

How many holes have we painted over and would rather leave it looking newly painted?

Me? I got out the saw... cut all the sheetrock... went upstairs to find the leaking tub drain and ...

Installed an access panel.

Now Im trying to get high on caffein and breathing in fresh Kilz oil-based primer... while writing you this.

What you're about to hear is one of the best shows I’ve done with a security vendor yet... I'll let you judge the solution.

I’ve been somewhat of a fan of Dark Trace for awhile and haven’t found a competitor until I ran into this nerd Pete Nicoletti.

He was hacked years ago before “Dell had pimples”

Traced the guy down

Had him arrested him,

And put away.

He has never lost to Dark Trace... who he calls “Dork Trace”

Has taken meantime to detection from 197days to 200 milliseconds

And meantime to repair from 76days to less than a day.

In short he finds more hidden weaknesses and holes in your walls faster

and he fixes holes in a day

before you’re (unbeknown to you) rotting foundation collapses
in on itself....

leaving nothing but a pile of worthless black mold once called a company

Spotlights of failure on you

Tarnishing your already weak and laughable career

Spotlights of failure on you standing in your batman underwear on the stage of corporate IT.

Code this in log analytics inside AD notes next to the out of order...

Out-of-line behavior logs.

Listen here... its a good one

March 18, 2020  

CISO: pessimistic people running money wasting departments

The Coronavirus Episodes are Coming, but first

Let's talk about a millennial accountant turned to Security

A real life cinderella story without the old CISO crones

... so clearly there must be some value in security

There must be some money worth spending

And of course it must be left up to a Millennial

Because old dudes in security are too crotchety

They are too negative... and beat up... and paid too much

Just move them onto the next job

where they can uncle fester for 2 years

Straight up, CISOs are pessimistic people that run

money wasting departments

So an accountant tuned security guy is the perfect match, because such a person can prove what a

waste of money security is... right?

Grab your torches and pitchforks...

Who cares who clicked on the no click report

You're a small fish anyways and no one cares

about hacking you.... just outsource the responsibility.

March 12, 2020  

Offensive IT, Getting out of Ticket Purgatory

If you don’t want to hear our childhood stories fast forward to "Offensive IT" at 11 minutes in... otherwise marry young enough that your wife doesn’t know what a boot-disk is.

  • Space camp with space shuttle and mission control

  • What does IT childhood look like for some.

  • Packaging and sustainability

  • From cost center to the fertile fruitful vibes of each other

  • Meeting with the Johns... not the Bobs

  • Vision centric leadership

  • PooPoo the Paper Process and Pollinate you IT Ideologies

  • The Olive Branch Approach

  • No Ticket Left Behind

  • Ticket Hell

  • Ticket Purgatory

  • One Note Evangelism

March 10, 2020  

Blowing Stuff Up with C4

Joe Scott: IT Manager at BMT

End-User Lurkers

Gaming circumvented his History Teacher Career

Cyrix P1 166

Blowing stuff up with C4

Fixing Systems in the Marine Core

Hyper focused delegation

Trusting people and handing off tasks

Helpdesk Frameworks

What's End-Game for IT Leaders

March 5, 2020  

IT Leader Robert Liebsch is Dissecting the Budget

IT Leader Robert Liebsch speaks about Dissecting the Budget

Speak the proper terms

but don't sound cliche'



Selling to Executive Management

People of the Old School

Office 2016 is no more October 2020

Floods of inbound encrypted data

Millennials learning botnets from xbox

Breaking down conversations with department.

February 26, 2020  

Special Lubrication

Special IT Lubrication...
ITs Not too small
ITs not too big
ITs mid-market IT
IT Specialist Geoff Beaune lubes the IT budget and tells the Selling to upper management story.
His company manufactures lubrication and was throwing money at everything but the helpdesk
MSPs weren’t managing, weren’t doing much... other than charging money.
  • The 1:100 ratio
  • Return on Investment
  • Fortinet Bullets and Shotgun Shells
  • Holding hands choking throats
  • Partnerships & Relationships
  • “You cant go with the guy just because they’re a fortune 100 company.”
  • The right fit for your unique end-users.
  • One change across Multiple Locations
February 25, 2020  

AVAYA crashed, not coming back up

Anthon Encao… now IT manager at Amazon

Has years of high-level government security clearance

The last network he managed couldn’t even touch the public Internet.

His raw truths and advice start with, “It’s not easier it’s harder”

“Good IT costs more money and takes more time period.”

But if you want to make more money (as a company)

And make more money faster

Then guess what?

You need to invest in IT

Oh yeah, and we cover a great story of his AVAYA PBX crashing

And never waking up… nope… took its final breath

What the heck would you do?

Hundreds of users down with no reboot

No way to turn it back on

February 20, 2020  

How to Stop Shadow IT from Ruining Your Life

On this episode James Ordinans (Senior Information Technology Manager at Hydrite) and Phil Howard Discuss:

  • Solutions & Results, not Tools & Toys
  • IT shouldn’t be just a Service Center
  • How to build a business tech solution
  • P&L versus EBITA
  • IT Business Training
  • Impacting analytics
  • Meaningful IT Work
  • How to ask and sell yourself
  • Communicating Value
February 18, 2020  

27 years in IT Not Avoiding Every Disaster at the Same Company

On this episode Greg Altmam (IT Infrastructure Manager at Swiff-Train Company) and Phil Howard Discuss..

  • EOL Disasters Avoided
  • Forklifting to Flexibility
  • Predating Ethernet IBM Mainframes
  • The Macro that turning 10 days into 3 hrs
  • Salted Shortel & Cisco Lemon Juice on Papercuts